Somehow, in the fog of immense grief, we allowed this message to be overlooked. The hospital, the people around us, ourselves (in doubt of our own selves and each other), everyone allowed this message to be diluted.. and to be lost.
And it may be the most important message of all:

I said NO, over and over again,

I. SAID. NO.

I said NO sternly as your intern watched wide eyed, surprised at a patient objecting,

I. SAID. NO.

I said NO quietly as I pleaded with you on the phone,

I. SAID. NO.

I said NO angrily as I walked away from your colleagues,

I. SAID. NO.

I said NO nicely as he played happily with your stethoscope,

I.  SAID. NO.

I said NO in my worried requests for a different option,

I. SAID. NO.

I said NO in my insistence on your credentials and your assurance that he would be safe,

I. SAID. NO.

I said NO for an entire year.

I. SAID. NO.

I said NO in a just plain, loud, clear, and simple “NO”, and it was not misunderstood.

I. SAID. NO.

I. SAID. NO.

I. SAID. NO.

I. SAID. NO.

I. SAID. NO.

I am Rowan’s mother.  MY NO MATTERED S

and I am Rowan’s father.  MY NO MATTEREDS

 

Copyright © rowansmile 2015. All Rights Reserved. No part of this website or any of its contents may be reproduced, copied, modified or adapted, without the prior written consent of the author. Rowan was killed at Rady Children’s Hospital as a direct result of the carefree and unnecessary use of general anesthesia for a “routine” outpatient diagnostic procedure.. Without his parents’ consent. It is okay to post a link to this page.